WTF appointment

I love that term....because seriously what the f**k happened, why didn't this IVF work for us???? Dr. A was genuinely surprised that our 1st IVF cycle wasn't successful considering our only known issue at this point is DH's morphology which wasn't an issue since we did ICSI. Everything else seemed "perfect" with this cycle. I am so tired of hearing that...because we still aren't pregnant!!

His reasoning for the failed cycle was honest, but not what I wanted to hear. He said that we just picked the wrong embryos to transfer, not all embryos make babies. I wish there was a more scientific answer, but there's not which is why we only had a 60% success rate. IVF is not 100% successful. He explained without doing the PGD (chromosomal testing on all the embryos) it is difficult to tell if the embryos are good enough to make a baby, you can only tell so much by how the embryos look. He has seen patients that have 30 eggs sent for PGD testing and only a couple are considered "normal" enough to transfer, meaning no abnormalities.

Out of the 7 embryos we have (2 already transferred, 5 frozen) he is confident that we will have at least one or two babies. I want to believe him, but I am cynical for obvious reasons. Even though we are sceptical, DH and I have to keep some hope that this will work or else why are we spending the time and money. We have to put faith in our 5 remaining embryos!!

I asked about doing more testing, primarily for NK cells , which can affect implantation. Overactive NK cells are treated with IVIg infusions (Intralipids) so that the immune system doesn't perceive the embryos as a foreign object and they have a chance of implanting and making it. The test costs $400 and the medication (Intralipids) is only $150, so he gave us the option of skipping the test all together to save $400 and just treat it, because it can't hurt anything...it can only help our chances. We are looking at this like a $150 insurance policy.

The good news.....we are doing the FET in May (2 weeks)!! I didn't think we would be able to move forward so quickly. AF is to thank for this....she showed 3 days after our 2nd negative beta. I am impressed that my body cooperated and stayed on schedule even though I was on all those meds for the IVF cycle. The other reason we are able to do an FET so quickly is that I will be doing a natural FET rather than medicated. No BCP's, Lupron, or Dex.....yay!! There is no big difference as far as end results. The requirements for doing a natural cycle are: you must have regular cycles and ovulate on your own...thankfully I am a candidate. There is one catch. I must have a dominant follicle on a CD 12 ultrasound, meaning I will ovulate, then I will be able to transfer in May. If not, I will do a medicated FET in June. Even if something happens and we can't do May, I am thankful to have the chance to let my body perform naturally and try again so soon after my failed IVF.

During our appointment we also talked about how many to thaw, transfer, and the thaw rate. He thinks we should thaw 3 of the 5 embryos. Not all embryos thaw correctly, so he is hoping for at least 2 to transfer, but said if all three thaw he suggests transferring all three. If only one thaws then he would want to thaw the rest of the embryos. I really hope this isn't that case because then we would use all 5 remaining embryos for 1 FET.

Emotionally DH & I are doing much better. Having talked to Dr. A, coming up with a plan, and being able to move forward so quickly with he FET has made dealing with the failed IVF easier. We don't have much time to sulk...we are moving forward. I will be catching up on all of your blogs this weekend. Thank you for understanding that I needed time away....but I am back.

I have an ultrasound a week from today Friday May 7th. If he sees a dominate follicle we will go ahead with the transfer. I could be PUPO again in just 2 weeks!!!